In Praise of Garters…

Can I just say, we did a very stupid thing when we let the fashion industry talk us out of these…

And no, I’m not talking about a gent’s black elastic jobbies that fasten about his little white spindle-shank leg to hold up his boring black socks.

I’m talking about the objects of beauty and desire and attainment, confections of ribbons and rosettes which were made to hold up a lady’s silk stockings and were tied just above the knee.

Once the waltz became fashionable–and that was introduced to England somewhere between 1806-ish and the spring of 1814–it became all the rage to wear fancy garters because when one twirled about, the gown would spin out and the garters would be revealed.

Fancy being a bloke back then–standing against the wall to gain a glimpse of these alluring limbs with these exquisite little creations about ’em.

And they were significant too.

There were special garters worn for a wedding, and the bridegroom’s removal of them was a signal and a proof that he had had access to the bride’s thighs and therefore to her.  It was a big deal.  And he would usually keep at least one of the garters, even taking it into battle with him if he were a soldier.   The other, of course, was often tossed out the window to his friends, again as proof, that he was getting on with the job.

But imagine it, pale silk stocking encasing the leg, and tied above the knee with these elegant adornments of lace, ribbon and rosettes…

Okay, shutting up now.